THE CHOSEN ONE (1998)

CHOSEN ONE, however, is the film to which I'd send anyone who heaped opprobrium on a mild formula-item like IF LOOKS COULD KILL.  CHOSEN is poorly directed, poorly photographed hokum from a guy whose main credits consist of Playboy "video documentaries."  Surprisingly, Lanoff has one other genre credit: a supernatural-possession tale called TEMPTRESS with Kim Delaney.  TEMPTRESS was dull but CHOSEN is in a boredom category all its own.

 Short and sweet: after Carmen Electra's sister is killed, Carmen finds out that the sister was some sort of Amerindian superhero/tribal protector, "The Raven."  Carmen also finds out that she's got to take over the burder of being the tribe's new superhero, though of course neither sister looks the least bit like a Native American.  Whatever powers the sister had are transferred to Carmen through a talisman, but unfortunately they also get transferred to Bad Girl Debra Xavier.  After many long softcore exhibition-scenes (only a few of which include actual sex), Carmen-- who has donned perhaps the worst superhero costume this side of Halle Berry's CATWOMAN (see above illo)-- fights Debra and wins.  The End.

Like most persons who peruse softcore films, I certainly don't expect superior plotting, as no one rents these films for the plots.  In fact, such films are best served by plots which are substantially invisible, providing quick setups that allow transition from one scene to another.  However, Lanoff and his scripters blunder by trying to justify Carmen Electra's new tribe-protector identity by including lots of ponderous voice-overs by the Native American father of the two sisters (who's never a character in the film as such).  The voice-overs are apparently there just to fill the viewer in on the mythic psuedo-Indian powers inherited by Carmen and Debra, but this tactic unfortunatly may instill the viewer with some small expectation that there ought to be a *visible* plot.  For instance, there are apparently a bunch of drug-smugglers running around the town where the sister dies, but they never really have much of anything to do with the conflict between Carmen and Debra, which mainly springs from their mutual regard for a hunky sheriff.

Further, this is probably the most anemic superhero film of all time, with but one poorly-choreographed fight at the end.  Even CATWOMAN sported some strong capoeira moves.

Perhaps the unkindest cut I can give CHOSEN is to say that even though it sports some nudity (though purportedly body doubles stand in for its star), the fully-clothed seduction-scene between Carole Davis and Richard Grieco in LOOKS is more enjoyable than anything in Lanoff's limp entry.